I hear from a lot of women that they struggle to find a work/life balance. They want to be all things to all people, and still have time to care for themselves. Of course, we all struggle with this: how to achieve balance when we’re juggling a million different things. The truth is, balance is bullshit.

There is no silver bullet that will help you find the perfect formula that you will always feel good about. But, I do have some tips that I think will help you to as-sess and improve your situation overall, so you can feel more in charge of your time, your priorities and your life!

Tip 1: Balance is Bullshit

The first tip I wanted to share is this, and I say it in complete honesty: Balance does not exist when you are a wife, mother, employee, etc. There is no such thing as perfect harmonious balance. I’ve never seen it; that’s how I know it is not real. Unfortunately, as women, we have all grown up in a society that has put the emphasis on men succeeding in work. They haven’t had the additional pressure to create a good work life and a happy home life with parenting re-sponsibilities. While this has certainly changed over the years, much like any strong branding, it doesn’t go away instantaneously. Women have been condi-tioned to think that we are the ones that need to find the balance.

We need to reframe these expectations. We are not responsible for being the very best employee, spouse and sole provider for parenting. This is challenging, because often women are the single parent and sole breadwinner and they really are responsible for doing it all. Often times, I hear from married women who feel they have to do it all because their spouse doesn’t pull his weight.

For women that are feeling these massive responsibilities, I’m simply asking you to lighten up on yourself! You can’t do it all. You can’t be the best at every-thing, all the time. No one can, and no one is. We will have days and times where we are killing it at work and times when things are good at home; we will also have times when home, work, love and family are all awful simultaneously. Just remember it will not stay this way forever. It never does. Balance is bull-shit. It fluctuates and changes, and this will change, too.