Press Clips

As the author of Confidence Creator and the host of the Creating Confidence podcast, Heather Monahan knows a thing or two about overcoming doubt to become her most certain self.

But how exactly did she get to that place? We had the opportunity to ask Heather a few questions about where doubt comes from and we can all work past it. Keep reading to find out if her insights might help you become a stronger and more confident version of yourself.

Sweety High: What makes us doubt ourselves?

Heather Monahan: Doubt can come from many places. It can stem from hearing your inner voice tell you to do something or you wanting to raise your hand and say something, but then holding yourself back and not doing it. Over time your inner voice will become more difficult to hear and you will begin to question if you should speak up or if you should listen to your inner voice.To get rid of this kind of doubt, the key is to act on your inner voice always. Listen to yourself. You have your answers. Your intuition is right. In order to tap into your intuition, you can journal at night. Write down how you feel when you do different things and are around different people. Over time you’ll begin to notice patterns and hear your inner voice, so you can now act on it! That will obliterate doubt.

Another thing that can cause doubt in ourselves is when we’re surrounded by others putting us down. Over time that will chip away at your confidence and you’ll begin to doubt yourself. It is critical to rid your life of toxic people and things, and surround yourself with people who encourage you and stretch you to grow.

Sometimes the negative voice in our life is our own. If you beat yourself up in your head and call yourself names, you need to begin rewriting this narrative. Use the same methodology advertisers use on you. Repetition and consistency are necessary to create change. Write down a list of things you want to say to yourself and then repeat it eight times a day. When you run this new positive tape in your mind over time, it will begin to change the way you feel about yourself. Try it for 30 days and watch the impact it’ll have on you.

SH: How can doubt hold us back?
HM: When you don’t believe wholeheartedly in yourself, you won’t take risks. You don’t share your great ideas for fear that others will not think they’re great. You don’t take chances, pursuing your dreams, because you doubt it’ll work. Doubt is a success killer. Those who doubt themselves usually want to fly under the radar in hopes they don’t get noticed to avoid further criticism. Doubt can hold you back at work, in your personal relationships and everything else in between.

SH: What are some of the most common doubts that young women come across?
HM: So many teens and young women doubt that they are good enough and doubt that things will work out for them if they go for more. They doubt they’ll get the job, get the guy, or doubt that others will like them. After journaling for years, I realized that I would doubt myself in nearly every situation until someone else would show me they were interested. I wanted to speak at a big conference for years, but never pitched myself until the man running the conference told me I was a great speaker. Then, I suddenly wanted to ask if I could speak at his event.

I can’t imagine how many things I held myself back from, waiting for others to tell me I was good enough before I went for something. Don’t wait for the invite. Create it yourself. What’s the worst that can happen? If you’re told no, that’s a beautiful thing. For every no that you get, you’re getting closer to your yes!

Doubt can come from our internal dialogue, the people we surround ourselves with, hanging on to self-limiting habits or even from social media and traditional media. If you find yourself feeling badly when you look at certain people’s feeds, unfollow them. If you Google someone to compare yourself to them, realize that you’re giving them your power and no one deserves your power other than you.

SH: How can doubt hold us back?
HM: When you don’t believe wholeheartedly in yourself, you won’t take risks. You don’t share your great ideas for fear that others will not think they’re great. You don’t take chances, pursuing your dreams, because you doubt it’ll work. Doubt is a success killer. Those who doubt themselves usually want to fly under the radar in hopes they don’t get noticed to avoid further criticism. Doubt can hold you back at work, in your personal relationships and everything else in between.

SH: What are some of the most common doubts that young women come across?
HM: So many teens and young women doubt that they are good enough and doubt that things will work out for them if they go for more. They doubt they’ll get the job, get the guy, or doubt that others will like them. After journaling for years, I realized that I would doubt myself in nearly every situation until someone else would show me they were interested. I wanted to speak at a big conference for years, but never pitched myself until the man running the conference told me I was a great speaker. Then, I suddenly wanted to ask if I could speak at his event.

I can’t imagine how many things I held myself back from, waiting for others to tell me I was good enough before I went for something. Don’t wait for the invite. Create it yourself. What’s the worst that can happen? If you’re told no, that’s a beautiful thing. For every no that you get, you’re getting closer to your yes!

Doubt can come from our internal dialogue, the people we surround ourselves with, hanging on to self-limiting habits or even from social media and traditional media. If you find yourself feeling badly when you look at certain people’s feeds, unfollow them. If you Google someone to compare yourself to them, realize that you’re giving them your power and no one deserves your power other than you.